REVIEW: THE CRYSTAL MAZE EXPERIENCE, LONDON

2 days ago
3 min read

Start the fans - we leap through the TV screen for high-adrenaline, Nineties nostalgia

Our 90s diet consisted of The Crystal Maze and Pop Tarts, washed down with Sunny Delight.

So we jump at the chance of starting the fans and leaping inside Shaftesbury Avenue’s Crystal Maze LIVE Experience.

It means we can also experience the immersive adventure’s brand new Ocean Zone, a Victorian recreation of the TV show’s legendary submarine world.

The experience starts by watching nostalgic Crystal Maze footage, with the OG Maze Master, Richard O’Brien flamboyantly passing the crystal baton onto our very own host, who bursts in through a door.

They are tough shoes to fill, but Mal is the perfect blend of David Tennant’s energetic Doctor Who eccentricities and Sue Perkins’ dry warmth, with plenty of O’Brien thrown in.

So follows a breathless, hilarious and surprisingly tense 75-minute adventure through the iconic Industrial, Ocean, Futuristic, Medieval and Aztec Zones, collecting crystals and points in a succession of mental, mystery, skill, and physical challenges.

The famous themetune soars dramatically in the background as we are shut into assorted rooms to beat the clock. Each group plays around 19 of the 30 games stuffed inside this fizzing time capsule.

Our Maze Master makes wise cracks, provides gentle hints and cheers us on as we climb walls to reach crystals in the Medieval Zone, attempt riddles with giant smart phones in the Futuristic Zone, leap about soft plays to press buttons and play surprise games for crystals to set teammates free from locked rooms.

Those not playing can watch through windows to shout encouragement and advice, before their two to three minutes are up.

Our favourite area is the Aztec Zone, which is forensically faithful to the TV show - we climb through tunnels and zip down a slide, into the sandy floored jungle.

Here, we enter rooms in a Mexican temple to guide balls across wooden structures to release crystals, play shuffleboard against our host, or answer a sun god’s riddles.

The TARDIS-like Futuristic Zone is also a big hit, where we (unsuccessfully) attempt to put hearts into alien cadavers, and don giant rubber gloves to guide balls through mazes.

But the big moment for any child of the Nineties is obviously The Dome, for the show’s grand finale.

By this point, we’re fully invested in the game, reverting to the Nineties kids who used to watch it religiously, and feeling like we’d climbed inside the TV screen.

We get to leap inside The Dome, press the red buttons to START THE FANS for the “four winds to blow” and then grab flying golden tokens with every limb and appendage in our possession. Each of the crystals earned in the game gives us more foil-grabbing time.

High on adrenaline and nostalgia - and picking gold foil from our teeth - we don satin bomber jackets for pics with our fabulous host.

Our final scores are tallied on the screen to the throngs of the themetune and a jazzy lighshow inside the dome. We discover we are - drumroll - “slightly above average.”

This experience is anything but that, and is a must for any child of the Nineties, and fans of immersive or escape room experiences.

Crystal Maze Experience London, 22 - 32 Shaftesbury Ave, London W1D 7EU. Tickets from £79/pp